Press Record.

I somehow negotiated a free brake/gear tuning. So that was good. That's all that was good.
A bird dropped out of a tree right in front of me and broke its leg then flapped into traffic. I moved it off the road with a leafy branch and poured some coke beside it. Coke must mend bird legs because it was gone when I came back. My legs became very tired.
I bug flew into my mouth and I ate it, I figured I could use the roughage.
And finally, to repay the free tune up I picked up a biking accessory, given my already superiorly cooshy seat, the only cheap/easy way to improve the comfort of my ride....
I am now wearing biking pants.
Stupid bike.